Thursday, April 19, 2012

"Don't Worry 'Bout Me"

 I miss my mother EVERY day, but I especially miss her a little more on this particular day. Five years ago, my mother went to Heaven. Hard to believe it's already been five years, it still feels like it was just a short time ago...I remember it like it was yesterday. Today I remember how hard it was to say good-bye. To watch and hear my mother's heartbeat flatline after being disconnected from life support was one of the most difficult experiences in my life. I remember being strong and trying my best not to cry because I knew that's what she would have wanted...and I still try to live by that. I never imagined that I would lose my mother at an early age, but I guess nobody really does, it just happens. This year is especially difficult because I now have a baby girl that I know my mother was really looking forward to meeting. She use to wonder why it was taking me so long to get married and have kids and as much as I would have loved to give her those things when she was alive, it just wasn't the right time then. I think about how different my life would be now with her still in it and I smile...*sigh*

There are no words to express how dearly I miss her. My heart aches every day for her touch, her voice, and her reassurance. There are many songs I hear that remind me of my mother, but this one I like the most...I think it's lyrics say it best, "Don't worry 'bout me"...that's exactly what she would say.


Why did she have to go
So young I just don't know why
Things happen half the time
Without reason without rhyme
Lovely, sweet young woman
Daughter, wife and mother
Makes no sense to me
I just have to believe

She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with Jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me

Loved ones she left behind
Just trying to survive
And understand the why
Feeling so lost inside
Anger shot straight at God
Then asking for His love
Empty with disbelief
Just hoping that maybe

She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with Jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me

It's hard to say goodbye
Her picture in my mind
Will always be of times I'll cherish
And I won't cry 'cause

She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me







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